Monday 19 March 2012

If you ignore me ...

... I do not go away.

For the past few days at work I have been managing the compilation of a set of questions that we would like our prospective client to answer. This has been run with a very tight time line imposed by the US Team. As a result I have spent much of my time attempting to persuade, cajole and on occasions subtly strong arm SMIs* to deliver the goods.

One of the SMIs was on holiday last week so I persuaded the Americans to extend their dead line and then worked with the SMI's Team Leaders and Managers to ensure that he was available to do the job first thing this morning. There was a fair bit of work for him to do so I wanted him to start as early as possible so that everything could be finished and fired over to The States before they woke up.

Being a courteous sort of chap I refrained from 'phoning the SMI at eight o'clock when I started work. Instead I sent him a text asking him to contact me as soon as he started work. I followed that up with an Instant Message and, when nine o'clock finally arrived, I phoned ...

... no answer, so I left a detailed voice message and waited...

... and waited. I needed to pop out to drop the Defender seats and covers over at the Trimmers so I updated the IM and left a further VM and nipped in to Redditch. I got home about 40 minutes later and checked my inbox, the IM tool and my phone. No contact from the SMI...

... I started chasing colleagues of the SMI and discovered that he was en-route to my Nearest Circle of Hell so I nudged a colleague at that location and asked them to "collar" the SMI and tell him I needed to talk to him urgently ...

... Eleven o'clock came and went and I had left further voice mails, additional IMs but not a peep was heard from the SMI. I eventually got hold of him at around eleven thirty when he advised that he was working on another project and had no knowledge of my request for his time or need for his services. He did comment that he had several missed calls from me. At this point I tried to put myself in his place and failed miserably ...

... If my mobile was showing half a dozen missed calls from the same number, a text message, a few detailed voice messages advising of an urgent task and a number of instant messages showing the same requests I think I would ring the Requestor back as soon as possible and try to get things resolved. This SMI decided that he would totally fucking ignore me, presumably in the hope that I would just disappear.

The little git refused to make a start on my task and it was only after a low level escalation and plea to another colleague that he actually, grudgingly agreed to start the task he was bloody supposed to do in the first place.

I really hope that he asks me for feed back as part of our appraisal process.
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* SMIs: Acronym, Subject Matter Idiots (plural). Please note that unfortunately there is always more than one SMI. Like the word Gallows there is no such thing as a singular form of SMIs. Thinking about this I wish that SMIs were even more closely connected to Gallows**
** in a sort of ropy, dangling way

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